About Mary

by @MarySueIRL

February 18, 2022

Run tests.  Ask "what works?"  Do that and... Run more tests...

I grew up in Chicago and have lived in the Silicon Valley, the Carolinas, South Africa, Scotland, and now Florida. I’ve traveled to many places and I most cherish trips wherein I can blend locally. Alone in Beijing, Shanghai, Rome and more, I wandered down back alleys, up rickety staircases and dined in family-run restaurants not accustomed to tourists. Travel is best when it feeds your ears, eyes and notebook as much as your entertainment and gustatory desires.

This was written by a human. Not AI.

This is me sharing words from my brain, in my own quirky way, with you, just as if we were sitting together chewing the cud and spilling some tea.

Thanks for being here.

I have some important anchors in my life. One is a blend of legacy and ikigai–a continually-narrowing definition of my purpose. I seek to express the stuff that my brain naturally oozes in a way that delivers value to others as a way to leave something unique behind for my sons.

Another anchor is something I call “infinite self-kaizen.” Kaizen, continual improvement, is, for me, a form of forgiving reflection and movement toward greater aspirations. Without judgment, I continually reflect on what worked in my day, and what I might do less of. I am continually pruning and seeking, from skills, to mindsets, to permissions, to people, to environments and experiences.

I have also been circling around the concept of techne: making and building “In Real Life” in order to hone a skill and art through practice vs. theory. The real world is our teacher; it bounces back at us when we misfire. With the mindset of self-kaizen, there is no judgment as we experiment in life, only learning and improved aim.

Anytime there seem to be too many goals, too many options, and too many solutions to too many problems, I anchor to the essence of what we should be doing here:

Run tests. Ask "what works?" Do that. And run more tests.

My social media links below share more about my corporate communications consulting background, education (go Deacs!) and more. At my core I’m a truther with a keyboard; I write to express the stripped-down realities of the world in which I live. I am a social introvert whose kryptonite is small talk; when parties devolve into surface-level chatter I look for a dog to play with or start shooting popcorn at people’s heads. I’ve jumped into pools fully-clothed to avoid small talk. I am disciplined and planful; I keep excel spreadsheet lists of my excel spreadsheet lists (you think I’m joking…) I do not gossip and I avoid people I hear whispering “and she this, and she that…” I befriend people who hold themselves accountable for creating their own conversation-worthy stories. I believe quiet is often wiser and braver than loud. Truth is braver and a better growth-catalyst than denial or chameleonism.

We are all here to use what we learn in a way that lifts others.
Life is a relay race; do not fear impermanence.
When you pass the baton...
ALL BOATS RISE.

A few more bits and ends to paint a more full, if pixelated, picture.

  • I am committed to purpose-driven transformation; I work to build tools to simplify this effort for all.
  • In a world wherein we are (shallowly) rewarded for being consumers of information and things, we are at risk of waiting for leaders, gurus and answers to find us, and reel us in. We can sometimes hide behind the shield that is our affiliation with these exogenously-manufactured brands. I have no attraction to luddites of this sort. It takes raw, rough, experiential testing of one's own personal beliefs and drivers to actually find The Way. There is no invitation coming from the queen. Just get on board and drive. We have but one chance.
  • A video journal entry on a key turning point in my journey
  • A bit more about my nerdier side (yes, one can get even nerdier!) can be found on BizDecoder.com
  • A little outside-the-blog background

Zero Carb * Intermittent Fasting * Autoimmune Protocol * Pescavore * Grain-free Dairy-free Seed-oil-free Sugar-free Sweetener-free * Celiac * Hashimoto’s * Stage III Cancer * Carabiner Codependency * Five-string Bluegrass Fan * Classical Ballet * Yoga * Outward Bound * Door County, Wisconsin * South Africa * Scotland * Stand-up Comedy * Silicon Valley * Florida * Chicago * Francophilia * Sarcasm * Essentialism & Minimalism * Warm Weather & Waters * Neurotransmitter Optimization * Natural Bio Optimization * Dry Wine * Hero’s Journey * Sashimi * Travel.

I'm the proud student of my best teacher, Donovan, a loving English lab. And the fraction of microseconds it would take for me to volunteer my life for my sons is too small to measure. I will proudly leave this earth having replaced myself with two exponentially higher value humans.

I love Mondays. I don't make new year's resolutions. And I want to work until the day I die.
- MarySueIRL

Latest Posts

Players vs. Planners: Why Infinite Self-Kaizen Wins Every Time

The perfect plan does not exist. The perfect path does not exist. And chasing either of them will keep you stuck indefinitely. In this post, I explain the mindset I call infinite self-kaizen, why it beats planning every time, and how making it physical through a notebook and totems keeps it working on the hardest days, when your old grooves are trying to pull you back in.

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I Was Robbed. But They Gained Nothing.

I have had things stolen from me. A diamond. A bracelet. And far more expensive losses in business, in legal battles, in relationships that ended badly. What I know from the inside of all of it is this: the person who robbed you gained almost nothing. And understanding exactly why is one of the most clarifying and freeing ideas I have encountered on this entire journey.

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Success Is a Finite Set of Choices: How to Stack Your Day So Your Biggest Goals Actually Get Built

Years ago I wrote something on my fridge: success is a finite set of choices that live in your daily habits. I still believe it. In this post, I share how I actually stack my day, the morning ambulation walk, the coffee shop environments for different kinds of work, the fasted workout by noon, the five minutes of meditation as a snow globe defrag, and why every piece of it was tested before it was chosen.

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